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It’s official! February 14th is less than a month away! Never mind that it was just Christmas, like, yesterday (or at least, that’s what it feels like.) We’re now onto the next big gift-giving holiday. If you haven’t already, it’s time to start figuring out your game plan. And for many in a relationship, that means finding the perfect Valentine’s Day gift.

Which… can be tricky. After all, giving the wrong gift can make for an extremely awkward V-day experience. But as daunting as it might seem, it doesn’t have to be that complicated.

Here’s your Valentine’s Day gift guide for every stage of a relationship.

Red Valentine's Day Gift

Valentine’s Day Gift Guide

If You’re Friends-With-Benefits

Under NO circumstances should you get your FWB a gift for Valentine’s Day! I repeat, under NO circumstances should you get them a gift.

No shade to anyone in a casual-hookup/friends-with-benefits situation. You do you. But, by definition, you’re not actually dating. So, gift-giving just isn’t part of the deal.

If you want to get together on Valentine’s Day for a Netflix-and-chill sesh, then by all means. Go for it. Just don’t show up with anything other than yourself.

If You’re Newly Dating

Look, it’s great that you met someone. And you say they’re amazing. Hell, maybe they are. But if you’ve been dating them for a month or less, this is not your holiday. Sorry.

If it’s been longer than a month but you’re not actually official yet, it’s a bit trickier. I’d say you should err on the side of caution, though, and refrain from giving a gift.

Now, you can certainly go on a Valentine’s Day date with your new love interest. But at this point, you don’t even know whether or not they’re into Valentine’s Day. So, the best thing to do in this situation is to communicate with them.

And even that shouldn’t be a big deal. Your conversation should be like your relationship: casual. The 14th falls on a Monday, so bring it up by simply asking, “Hey, did you want to do something together on Monday?”

If they do, then your date is your gift. And if they don’t, then you now know where they stand on the issue of Valentine’s Day.

If You’re Exclusive

Once you’ve had the ‘DTR’ talk, you definitely need to celebrate this one.

But, just because you’re exclusive it doesn’t mean you’re in a serious or committed relationship. So gift-giving can still be a bit of a grey area.

Again, communication is going to be important here.

You should talk with your partner to find out their views on Valentine’s Day.

Valentine's Day chocolates

If they’re into it, plan a fun, yet relatively inexpensive date. Spend the day at a winery, cook a romantic dinner for them, or go ice skating together.

As for gift-giving, a good rule of thumb would be no more than $10-$20 for every month you’ve been together.

  • 1-2 months: a card and homemade cookies or a bag of their favorite candy
  • 3-4 months: chocolate covered strawberries, box of chocolates, bath products, or cute DIY gift
  • 4-6 months: consider flowers, simple jewelry (nothing too expensive), a pair of pajamas, or perfume

If You’re Serious

‘Serious’ is a fairly subjective term, but if you’ve already said “I love you,” this category is a safe bet for you.

At this point you can get a little more creative with both your Valentine’s Day date and your gift. Try a couple’s massage, a theatre show, a concert, or a really fancy dinner.

For gifts, consider something like a ‘Wine of the Month’ subscription, nice jewelry, or lingerie. (Because, if you’re going to give your love lingerie, you really should be in a serious relationship.)

You could also think about a weekend trip somewhere. Which, of course, could easily be your gift.

If You’re Married

This one obviously falls into the same ‘serious’ category, but with one caveat. If it’s your first Valentine’s Day after getting married, you should try and make it extra special.

A personalized gift, like something engraved with your wedding date, would be good.

If  you’ve been married for a little while, though, ask your partner what they want to do. Maybe they just want a day at home without having to stress about chores. In that case, offer to let them relax while you take care of the housework.

Conclusion

The absolute best thing you can do, regardless of where you are in your relationship, is talk to your partner ahead of time about their V-day expectations. Even if you think it’s a hallmark holiday, it’s good to make sure you’re both on the same page.

What do you think of my Valentine’s Day gift guide? Do you have any other fun gift suggestions? Let me know in the comments below!

xx Katie

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2 Comments

  1. avatar

    This was such a great post! I am not in a relationship, but reading also about tips and not only presents was great! Completely agree on talking before hands instead of making it awkward or being disappointed at the end, thanks for sharing x

    1. avatar

      Absolutely! Not knowing what the other person wants/expects can make for a very uncomfortable result

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30ish Lifestyle blogger, relationship "expert," and modern-day agony aunt.
Sometimes humorous, always honest.